Remembering Her
Everbody loves Social Networking Sites.Who would'nt be tempted to Join,Communicate with old friends and meet someone new. My story started when I was 9 years old.During that time,my knowledge in Networking sites is very limited so I like to explore and study the website.I used to spend 8 hours a day just to learn and to be familiar with the Site. I remembered how I typed random names and randomly send them a message.That's when I met her,that's when my story started... 'Chapter 1-The Beginning of Everything' My name is Matthew Alexander Caruso.For short "Matt".I am a Half Italian-Half Filipino and Im on the Second year of the best Four Years of my life. Five years has passed and I still am addicted on Social Networking Sites. Five years has passed and I still am in love with her. Her name is Danica Rose Ponce.She is 15 years old.She lives in Pampanga,Philippines. Well,at least that is what her profile says. Am I a stalker? You can say that...I visit her profile every now and then.I just cant get enough of her face...She's just perfect...too perfect. Her long,beautiful hair falls perfectly without her even trying. Her eyes shines like the stars. That is how I see her on her pictures. I can only see her hair,eyes and her face... Everyday all I think about is her. Everynight all I dream about is her. She dominated my world,my time and my heart and I wonder "Is this it?Could this be my first love?Could this be my first kiss?" 'Chapter 2-Iv'e read a beautiful message' "Finally I finished my Sophomore and YES! Im one of the Top 10!!!" After 10 Months of Pain and Sacrifice,I finally finished my Second Year.I felt so happy I wanna let the world know so I posted it on my account... I slept that night thinking about tomorrow.A new day,new life and hopefully a new lovelife.I wanna explore the world and learn more about it. When I woke up that morning I realized it's Summer Vacation.I was so excited to take off and feel free but then I realized it's too early so instead I checked my account. A New Message! Who could this be?Nobody messages me except my bestfriends but Im pretty sure they havent opened their account yet.I checked to see what's inside the message... "Hey Matt,I just wanna say Congratulations and I hope we'll meet soon." ''--Danicaxxx :)'' Danicaxxx? It took me a second to realize who's Danicaxxx. It was Danica Rose,my crush since I was 9 years old. Why did she congratulated me? For graduating Sophomore? How did she know? A lot of questions flooded my mind.I did'nt know what to do.I didnt know what to reply to her. "Hi Danica...Thank you and hopefully we'll meet soon." Message Sent 'Chapter 3-Is this for real?' I have spent the whole summer thinking about her.For two months I was hoping that she'll reply back...but she didn't.She haven't talked to me again.She's been off for so long.She haven't posted anything.Not a picture,not a comment,not a word.For two months I was wondering "What happened to Danica?What happened to my crush?" I logged out and prepared myself for the first day of my Junior Year and the start of another Ten months of hardwork. I was walking towards school when I saw an unfamiliar car and inside is someone familiar but my mind is thinking about Danica so I ignored it. Danica...Why did'nt she reply,Why did'nt she logged in on her account. I guess I thought a lot about Danica that I did'nt even realize I'm already at school. My school is a public school so it is not so big,not so small either.It's just perfect for 2000 students to be exact. I proceeded to my homeroom.There I saw old faces. Chie Yap-He is my bestfriend since pre-school.He is a Chinese-Italian so we shared a lot of similarities.He is the sporty one in our group. Bianca Domingo-She is Spanish but she grew up here in the Philippines and she is the cool-rebel one. Kim Sey-She is the cousin of Chie but she only moved here in the Philippines a few years ago.She is the conservative one. Ephie Salgado-He is the boyfriend of Bianca.He is a Filipino-American and he is the smart one in our group. Those four are my real bestfriends.We hang-out together,play together,study together. They were talking to a girl who looks familiar. I walked closer to them and I realized she was the one I saw a while ago. "Matt!!!"Chie saw me and shouted my name.The five of them looked at me and I looked at them. There's Chie,his sister Kim,Bianca and her boyfriend Ephie and.... and... and...Danica. 'Chapter 4-Worst Nightmare.Ever' ..... Slap me Hard... I forgot how to breathe for a second when I saw her face.It was startled that I havent noticed my friends are laughing at me. Chie:"What's the matter Matt?You look funny." I look funny??For real?My crush is standing 5 feet away from me so don't expect me to look formal. I want to say that but I can't say anything,I can't even move or even breath until Bianca slapped me. "Ouch!" They all laughed including Danica.I dont know why..maybe its because I act so childish or maybe I just look so stupid. Bianca:"Matt this is Danica and Danica this is Matt." Ephie:"She just moved here and she's from Pampanga." "Hello,it's nice to finally meet you Matthew." That was the first time I heard her voice.It was sweet and so relaxing.And her smile is just too perfect. "Umm,Hi" That's all I can manage. Ringggg The bell rang and the classes started. I wasn't paying attention to the teachers, I was looking at Danica the whole time. I'm making sure that in every class I am sitting close to her but not too close or she'll notice. She's just too beautiful,too gorgeous,too perfect. Whenever she looks at me or smile at me,I tried to ignore her but I can't because I dont know what to do.It seems that the world stops whenever her eyes laid on me. I wanna die right now. I want to shout.I want to shout how stupid I am.I want to shout how beautiful she is.I want to shout how much I love her.I want to shout her name. "DDDAAANNNIIICCCAAA!!!" 'I shouted... and then I woke up from my nightmare. Chapter 5-Huge Disappointment '....Just a dream.... I thought that was real. Well,Im hoping it'll be real but will I be really scared and act so stupid when Danica is somewhere around? I hope not. I got up from bed looking outside of my window and saw an unfamiliar car. It was the exact car from my dream. Danica... No way.There's no way that my dream is true.There's no way I'm gonna see Danica.Ever. I slapped my face hard for me to wake up. Am I hallucinating?? I Hope So...I dont want to see Danica in person...Okay,maybe I want too see her in person but heck I am scared... I fixed myself for school..Now this is real.Now I am awake.Im so excited as well as nervous. ---- When I arrived at school many people called unto my name.Well,being one of the smartest students in this school makes you an instant celebrity.Many congratulated me.Some just said Hi,a few just called out my name. I entered my homeroom.It looks like the Outer Space packed in a small room. It is full of random rocks,random planet figures and stuff about the outer space. I looked around and I saw them. Chie,Kim,Bianca and Ephie. But this time there's no Danica. No sign of her. What was I thinking??She can't be here.She'll never be here. My Danica...We'll never meet... Never. 'Chapter 6-A Dream Come True' The teacher entered the room.One thing I can say about her. She looks soo Medusa.In other words,she looks pretty scary.From her curly and snaky hair to her petrifying eyes,she really looks like the woman who turns people into tombstones. "Welcome 3rd years,now before we begin I have a very special seat plan for all of you." Her voice even sound like her. "Now I will write your arrangement on the board so you can find your seat." And she started writing. 1.Amechachurra 2.Artifice 3.Bartolome 4.Belmonte 5.Cabangil 6.Caruso 7.Doming''o . 18.Ponce . ''22.Salgado 23.Sey 24.Sombero 25.Yap Im on the 6th seat beside Cabangil,who I don't really know maybe because both of us are shy to each other and Bianca,who's been my annoying seatmate for 3 years. I scanned the list but skipped some of them.So there's 25 of us. I scanned the room.Only 24.One is missing.I counted the seats and stopped at number 18.I checked the board to see who is it and I saw the name of the person I don't want to see.Ponce. As I was about to say something to Bianca,Someone entered the room,panting and sweating.It was her. "Sorry Ma'am I am late.The traffic outside is pretty huge." She said it with pauses between words. "Ms.Ponce go sit on the vacant chair so we can start our introductions." As she was about to take her seat Mrs.Gorgon said something. "Ms.Ponce since you're still not taking your seat,how about you'll be the one to introduce yourself." And suddenly Claps and Cheers filled our room.She walked to the front which was not really necessary but we,especially I listened to her. "Hello Everyone I am Danica Ponce I am 15 years old and I am obviously a transferee." She said it without pausing this time. "Okay Ms.Ponce before you take your seat please select one of the names your classmates on the board to introduce themselves next." Danica scanned the board. "Ma'am I choose ... ...Mr.Caruso" Chapter 7-A Surprise.A not-so-good surprise. "My name is Matthew Alexander Caruso.You can call me Matt or Matty.I am a Filipino-Italian and please add me on Facebook." When all of us finished our introductions Mrs.Medusa introduced herself. "Okay class,I am Mrs.Merusa,your adviser this year as well as your Geometry teacher." Okay so she's not Mrs.Medusa,she is Mrs.Merusa.Close Enough. I talked to my friends at lunch.I always want them to know about me having a crush on Danica.So when we were talking I opened a topic about her. "How bout Danica.What'dya think about her?" I asked them. "Well she's cool but I don't like her." Bianca said "How bout you Matt?" "Well I kinda--" I was about to tell them that I like her but Chie interrupted me. "I like her and I'm asking her later if she's ready for a relationship." WHAT?My bestfriend and I like the same girl. NO WAY!NO WAY! SHE'S MINE.SHE CAN'T BE CHIE'S GIRLFRIEND. But instead of shouting on the cafeteria I just smiled and said "Oh yeah.Well both of you look awesome together." STUPID! Chapter 8-Mismatched "...And I got her phone number." Chie told us what happened yesterday during his "private" convo with Danica. F*** I should be the one to ask Danice out not my bestfriend. "Really Chie?That's great!So now only Matt is the only one without a lovelife." Ephie said And then the topic changed from Chie and Danica to Me and Kim. "Cmon Matt you and Kim look good together,you just need to ask her out." Bianca said I don't know if Im hallucinating but I saw Kim blushing and smiling. Does she like me?Hope not. RRRIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! "Cmon guys I'll introduce you to her" Chie said.I know who's "Her".Its Danica.I dont wanna meet her.Not yet. "Umm guys,Ill go home first.Ummmm,My parents are umm...They need me to ummm...fix..a...thing." "Go Home Matt,you're always a bad liar!" Bianca shooed me away. I laughed.We all did actually. I said Bye and went home.I wasnt looking on where I am going.I just knew that I need to go home. ---- The next morning when I arrived at school,I saw the whole group talking and laughing with Danica. One day of introduction and they seem to know each other for years. I went to the canteen to buy some food coz Im kinda hungry when I saw Kim. "Hi Kim..." I managed to smile She smiled back and said "Hey Matt" "Where are you going?" I asked her "Umm,to the canteen" "Wanna go with me?Mabe we can eat there together and maybe talk" I asked her "Ummmm Matt??Are you asking me out?" she said with a faint smile and Im pretty sure she's blushing right now. Asking her out?Asking Kim out?I never thought of that.But she seemed pretty happy about the idea of Me and Her dating so I dont wanna disappoint her. "Uhmm,I guess?" and I laughed. When we arrived in the cafeteria I did not expect to see whos in there... It was..... Chapter 9-My First Kiss I wish I was day-dreaming.But I wasn't. I looked at the face of Kim and she was as stunned as I am on what we are seeing. It was Chie kissing Danica on her cheeks. It seemed like the time stopped.I think we've been standing there for weeks,months,years or even ages.But Chie's lips is still glued on the cheeks of Danica. It is really them and they really are together.And I can't do anything about it. Kim grabbed my hand and we walked towards them.As we get closer I saw Danica's face and I think she was also shocked but she seemed happy. Chie just stopped when he saw us.He looks pretty happy.And I want to tell him to "back off...she's my girlfriend." But she's not.And she doesn't even talk to me.And maybe she doesn't even know me. "So are you two going out already?"Chie asked us"Just when?" "Yes.Just a while ago."I said it with a gulp. Kim smiled and sat at the chair in front of them.I sat beside Kim and surprisingly she kissed me. Chapter 10- My Biggest Regret SHE JUST KISSED ME!!! Kissed by a girl in front of your dreamgirl is the worst thing that could happen to you.And it just happened to me. "WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT?" I shouted at her "DID YOU KNOW WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?" "YOU JUST KISSED ME WITHOUT MY PERMISSION." "So-sorry" she said with a little voice "I just thought-" "THOUGHT WHAT?THAT YOU CAN KISS ME ANYTIME YOU WANT?IS THAT WHAT YOU THINK,HUH?" I shouted at her louder this time. SHe bursted into tears and Chie ran after her. I thought Danica would follow Chie but she sat next to me. "It's okay Matt.It was just an accident."she said "An accident?How can that be an accident?"I said it with a calmer voice "She kissed me and worse in front of you guys.Now tell me how can you call that an accident?" "Im sorry Matt."She said and hugged me . I dont know what to do so I just hugged her back.And there was I,savoring the short moment and warmth of Danica. ---- The day after that,Kim wasnt in school. Ephie and Bianca have been expelled due to fighting inside the school campus.Long Story. Worse is that Danica and Chie isnt talking to me or looking at me. I tried to talk to Danica but Chie always drag Danica wherever he goes. Days,Weeks,and Months have passed and the situation is still the same. I was still alone.With nobody to talk to.Until one day,the day before classes end , I was sitting under a tree,Danica sat beside me with teary eyes. "She's dead,Kim,Stage Four Cancer.Chie said She got that since she was born and you were the only reason why she's still fighting.But after the day you got angry at her.Things got worse.She's been in the hospital for 3 months and after that she passed away."Danica said One,Two,Three tears fell in my eyes.Not only because she died but also because I am the reason she died.I am the reason why she gave up. "But she already have forgiven you and she also hopes you already forgave her."Danica added "But Matt,this is not what I am here for." "What do you mean?"I asked her "Me and Chie,we have planned to move to Canada to continue our studies.We have planned it since Kim's death.And I am here to say goodbye.I am here to say that we are leaving and I dont want to leave without you." "Matt since I laid my eyes on you.Since we began talking to each other through Social Networks.I already loved you.You were my love since childhood and I just want to tell you that if you want I'll broke up with Chie and go with you.We can go wherever we want Matt and we will be happy together."she started to cry I started to cry more.I wanted to shout,to get angry because for Months I havent even confessed what I felt about her.And that is my biggest mistake,my biggest regret. "You can't,We can't.Go with Chie,He deserves your love."I said and I walked away from her and started crying real hard.I walked away without looking back,catching a single,last glimpse of her,of Danica,my Danica. Chapter 11-The End I was standing in front of a tomb that belongs to a special girl. It's been four years since Kim's death. Wind blew away the tears on my cheeks. I knelt and prayed for her spirit. I stood up,looked around and walked towards a restaurant. A few months ago,Danica sent me a message that she'll be going home from Canada today,she said she wants to talk to me. When I entered the restaurant,it took me a few seconds to recognize the face of Danica. I sat down in front of her and she smiled at me.I smiled back. It seemed awkward talking to her again but this time I have no feelings for her.None.Taken by time. We talked for what seemed hours.We talked about her life,my life,Chie and stuff I dont really care. Finally she said goodbye.I walked away still feeling nothing.I dont understand why am I acting like this. I decided to go to a building.I climbed up to the rooftop and walked towards the edge still with no feelings. I looked up the sky above me and the city below. I have to make a decision. I chose... I jumped. and I remembered the face of Danica and then a total blackout. Category:Stories Category:Love Category:Loss